Squared Circle Thoughts | WWE Battleground 2017

Let’s get this over with.

Time for yet anther WWE spectacle… you’ll see what I mean by that in a bit. This time, we got the SmackDown-exclusive PPV, Battleground. After Great Balls of Fire, the blue brand had it’s work cut out for it. Did it succeed? Well…

As I just said, this was a fucking spectacle. Especially the ending. Let’s see what I mean by that. Into the action.

The Usos (c) vs New Day (SmackDown Tag Team Title)

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Starting off with a really fun opener! Great match put on by these 4 guys. I’m honestly kinda sick of New Day at this point and the Usos have been on fire since winning the belts, but this was still a damn entertaining bout that got a ”this is awesome” chant… then again, what don’t they chant that for… but this time I agree. Really good match and new tag champs as New Day pick up the win. Looking forward to the rematch.

(If New Day hold the belts for over a year again, i’ll scream)

Shinsuke Nakamura vs Baron Corbin

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I wasn’t sure what to expect going into this one; wasn’t sure what kind of match these two could have. But this one was decent for what it was. Pretty good back and forth action and some decent spots, but that’s about it. Nakamura wins by DQ after Baron hits him with a low blow. Then post-match Baron assaults him a bit more and hits the End of Days. Clearly there will be a rematch. Hopefully it will be better. Again, decent overall.

Fatal 5-Way Elimination Match: Charlotte vs Becky Lynch vs Natalya vs Tamina vs Lana

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Multiple-person match of the night, the 5 SmackDown ladies battle for the #1 contendership for the SD Womens title at SummerSlam. Again, decent at best match. Everyone got in what they could and had little time to really shine. The match pretty much ended out of nowhere with rapid-fire eliminations of the first 3 girls and Natalya scoring a roll-up pin out of nowhere. Natalya wins and is going to SummerSlam to face Naomi. Uhhhh, ok.

AJ Styles vs Kevin Owens (United States Title)

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You can always expect a banger out of these two, whether it be against each other or anyone else. This was a pretty good match… until the finish. Good back and forth action, cool spots and good psychology and all-round a good bout that ended in a crappy submission-pin type deal that gave Kevin Owens the victory. Ughhhhh. Owens is once again US champ. Not complaining about that, just the finish. Could have at least been a bit more interesting. It is what it is I suppose. Again, good match, shitty finish. Guess we can expect another match between these two at SummerSlam.

Flag Match: John Cena vs Rusev

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I didn’t really care much for this one. I like both guys, but this isn’t anything we haven’t seen before. Short story short, decent match overall with some good storytelling and pretty damn physical action. They got what they could out of it. After grabbing their respective flags and fighting up the ramp and after a few suspense spots, John Cena wins after putting Rusev through a couple tables and sticking his flag into the pole for the win. Again, decent match overall that I wasn’t really all that invested in.

Sami Zayn vs Mike Kanellis

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This match could have gone either way. It was obviously a cool-down match before the main event, but it still could have been a good one. Again… AGAIN, it was a decent at best match. I’m sure it could have been better, but maybe they were told to hold back. So it’s whatever. After some okay back and forth action and cheat tactics from Maria, Sami Zayn wins with the Helluva Kick. That’s about it. Could have been better, but fine for what it was.

Also…

Just can’t get enough.

Punjabi Prison Match: Jinder Mahal (c) vs Randy Orton (WWE Title)

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Oh my lord… are you serious?… Ughhhhhhhhhhhhh

In tonight’s main event, the third ever Punjabi Prison match (the first two of which sucked). Hopefully the final match between Randy Orton & Junder Mahal. I’m going to make this quick and easy. This match was nothing special. Some below average action between these two, Randy fighting off the Singh Brothers for a majority of it, a couple sick bumps via the Singhs and boy oh boy… the finish.

At the end of the match, Randy looks to be climbing out of the outer cage and closing in on victory, then suddenly, Jinder’s music hit, the crowd pops (shockingly)… and out walks The Great… Fucking… Goddamn… Khali. The giant, lumbering, sloppy, unmovable bum that was the butt of ridicule for years has returned. He holds Randy Orton down by the throat as Jinder climbs out for the win. Jinder is still champ. The two then walk up the ramp celebrating as Khali keeps lifting the belt as if he just won it. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… phooey.

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So, overall, this was a very, very, VERY weak show. Just a bunch of okay at best matches with one really good one out of all of them. The damn opener. Easily match of the night. Props to New Day & The Usos. Everything else was just fucking dull. The Flag match was boring, the womens match was weak, Zayn vs Kanellis was dull and not even AJ Styles and Kevn fucking Owens could save this show. Or even Shinsuke. And that ending. Ohhhhh sweet mother of mercy, that ending. He’s back. He really is back. Wonderful.

Like I said, this show was a spectacle. A spectacle of utter crap. Weak, weak, weak. It’s astounding how far SmackDown has fallen since the Superstar Shakeup thing, and it looks like it’s going to fall further after this. Going into SummerSlam, that’s not good. I can only hope they pull something out of their asses to spice things up a little. We can only hope… hopelessly.

Until next time.

-Scvm

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